Sure, I may have only gone 2-2 in my picks over the weekend, but even in the games where I erroneously picked the winner, my prognostications were essentially correct.
(I love how He Who Hits Bombs took time out of his busy schedule of touching himself and playing online poker to point out that I was 0-1 after Saturday’s early game. Also, how long is he going to keep bringing up his 2006 Ontario Batting Title? There has to be some sort of statute of limitations on such braggadocio. What have you done for me lately?)
What did Tewks say was of utmost importance for a team to win games in the postseason?
1. A quarterback who doesn’t completely suck and doesn’t kill his team with turnovers
2. A great run game
3. A stingy defence
Dirty Sanchez gave the Jets perfectly serviceable quarterback play. He wasn’t flashy, but he didn’t do anything stupid. Sanchez made short, smart passes and let his run game take care of the rest. Carson Palmer completed less than 50% of his passes and also threw an interception.
I’m going to be honest. I tried to watch this game, but it was just too boring. Neither team deserved to be in the playoffs in the first place. Dirty Sanchez and the J-E-T-S will get demolished by the Chargers next weekend.
The Philadelphia Eagles held up their end of my prediction for a low scoring game. Chunky Soup may well be the “soup that eats like a meal”, but it doesn’t win football games in January.
I think Tony Romo had an “I’m Keith Hernandez” moment on Saturday night. Remember the episode of Seinfeld when Keith Hernandez is dating Elaine and he’s nervous to kiss her after their date? He pumps himself up by running through his stats in his head and vocalizes that he’s Keith Hernandez. He then goes in for the kill and undoubtedly slips Ms. Benes the tongue. Elaine internally wonders, “Who does this guy think he is?” Answer: “I’m Keith Hernandez”.
I’ll bet Tony Romo was warming up on the field before the game and was probably a little nervous. But, then the following went through his mind: “I have intimate knowledge of both Carrie Underwood and Jessica Simpson’s lady parts. Being at the precipice of such earthly delights is way more nerve-wracking than a silly little football game. I’m Tony Romo.”
I was completely right about the Baltimore/New England game, except that I was wrong about which quarterback was going to blow it. Jesus, Tom Brady was terrible. You could tell that his garter was all twisted up from the first play of the game. Three INTs and a fumble? Way to lay an egg, Tommy Boy.
Joe Flacco wasn’t very good either, but he only had one turnover instead of four (Please see item #1 above). And the Ravens had 234 rushing yards (item #2).
Last night’s contest was the best game of the year, hands down. Both offences came out firing. Kurt Warner and Aaron Rodgers showed the rest of the wildcard quarterbacks how the position is supposed to be played.
I predicted 103 points to be scored and was only off by seven. I guarantee no paid football observer was as close as I was. Yes, the final score was a little closer than I expected, but here’s what I think happened.
God, I mean Brett Favre, was willing his boy Kurt and the Cards to victory at the beginning of the game (evidenced by Arizona’s lightning fast start and seventeen point lead). But, then Favre figured the game was out of hand, so he put on a pair of Wrangler jeans and went outside to play touch football with his Labrador Retriever.
His Holiness didn’t come back inside until the beginning of overtime and promptly stuck a pin into the right hand of his Aaron Rodger’s voodoo doll.
To recap, I am 2-2 thus far in the postseason with seven games remaining. And I’m just getting warmed up.
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