The Toronto Raptors are completely flipping the script on what is expected of a professional sports franchise in the Big Smoke. The Raptors have ignored the memo that Toronto teams are supposed to be cellar dwellers, where the possibility of a playoff spot is nothing more than a dream vanishing into the air like chimney smoke on a bitterly cold, winter’s day (yes, I am looking out the window).
I know I have been brutally tough on the Raptors, Chris Bosh specifically, in the past, but I must admit I am very impressed with their play of late. My biggest problem with the team has been that they don’t play with heart and don’t appear to possess one iota of mental toughness or testicular fortitude.
The Raptors are a talented team, but talent can only take you so far. Talent can get you forty wins in a season, with the majority of them coming against teams below you in the standings. To succeed in the postseason, where it counts, you need grit, heart and sandpaper. The top teams in the NBA have this in spades. If they are going to lose a game, then they are going to go down fighting.
Too often, the Raptors just lie down and die in the face of adversity. But, something has changed in the last couple of weeks. They’re starting to play with a swagger. They believe they can hang with teams in the upper echelon of the NBA. It’s becoming exciting to follow the Raptors again.
To whom can the turnaround be attributed? One man and one man only: Jay Triano.
It’s Triano who is responsible for instituting a culture of accountability and challenging his players to play with an edge. Unfortunately, it took him half a season to get his European and American born players to start playing like a bunch of playoff-hungry Canadians.
Even Hedo Turkoglu has proved to be up to the challenge. For the first three months of the season, he played like a corpse. Over the last few weeks, Turkoglu appears to be at least playing with a pulse and the mobility of a geriatric. Maybe by the time playoffs roll around he will resemble a professional basketball player.
I might even have to start watching Raptors games again, instead of just watching the highlights or reading the game recaps the next morning. Look at who they’ve beaten in 2010: Orlando Magic, Los Angeles Lakers, Miami Heat and the Knicks on the road.
It’s pathetic that this city gets excited about a team that’s three games over .500 but, let’s be honest, beggars can’t be choosers.
For the second day in a row, a lengthy suspension has dominated the headlines at Talkin’ with Tewks. NBA Commissioner, David Stern, has suspended both Gilbert Arenas and Javari Crittenton for the rest of the 2009-10 season for bringing firearms into the Verizon Centre locker room.
What’s most intriguing about this story is that the NBA actually has a law in place to punish such actions. Apparently, the Wizards guards became the first players to violate an NBA rule that prohibits firearms on team property.
Does anyone else find it disconcerting that such a rule needs to be instituted in the first place?
I would think that functional members of society would inherently understand that bringing guns into the workplace is probably not a good idea. It’s terrifying to think that the NBA was so concerned about this issue that it needed to be added to a clause in the collective bargaining agreement.
I know the political correct police get up in arms when NBA players are referred to as thugs, but what else do you call people who resort to brandishing guns after a card game dispute?
What planet are these guys living on? They do realize that movies like The Good, the Bad and the Ugly and Tombstone are made up, right? They are supposed to be professionals; professionals don’t act like petulant gang bangers who wave guns in the air to overcompensate for their small penises.
This cowardly display of steel to exert authority and appear menacing is so typical of basketball players in general. They all preen and prance around, acting like the toughest hombres in town (see Bosh, Chris), but what happens when these mincing dandies are faced with an actual confrontation?
They resort to childish slaps and hope that teammates will come “hold them back” from getting into a donnybrook.
Have you seen a basketball fight? It’s pathetic. These supposedly big, tough guys turn into nine year olds girls fighting on the playground. There’s yelling and screaming, probably some crying, and futile attempts at bitch slapping the object of their derision.
There’s a reason why these big ladies need to carry guns around. They can’t settle scores real man style, so they need to hide behind their glocks. You wouldn’t see hockey players waving guns at each other after a locker room dispute. They’d settle it with their fists, shake hands and then go get a beer.
That’s the manly (and Canadian) way. Oddly enough, those terms are not mutually exclusive.
I’ve steered clear of commenting on the vicious elbow Patrice Cormier delivered to the head of Mikael Tam because I wanted to wait and see if the QMJHL would have the cojones to dole out a proper punishment. Surprisingly, they did, and the league meted out a suspension for the rest of the season and playoffs to Canada’s World Junior captain.
I figured the issue was to put to bed and I could avoid discussing it since I’ve already given my thoughts on head shots in hockey. However, I read in the Toronto Star today that Patrice Cormier plans to appeal his suspension because it’s “too severe.”
Are you fucking kidding me?
(Quick aside: Excellent work, as always, by CSzem with his thoughts on The Bachelor. In fact, his insight is almost too good. You swear you’re not getting help from your wife? Also, have you made any progress with The Bachelor podcast idea? We need to make this happen. Click on my contributor link and send me an email. A brainstorm session may be needed.)
Cormier’s cowardly attack on Lam wasn’t a clean hit gone awry, like Michael Liambis’ hit on Ben Fanelli earlier in the year. This was premeditated thuggery with the intent to severely injure. There is no other explanation for such a brutal act.
Cormier came off the bench and used his elbow as a battering ram to knock the oblivious Lam into next week. In some cases, elbow shots to the head can occur if the opposing player ducks his at the last minute or there is a large size discrepancy between players. Those instances are just unfortunate accidents.
In this case, Cormier actually stuck his elbow into the air to clock Lam in the face. It was the epitome of a cheap shot and the work of a complete pussy.
Watching Lam lay bloody and battered on the ice, his body wracked with convulsions, was one of the most disturbing things I have ever witnessed on the ice (second only to Todd Bertuzzi’s blind side mugging of Steve Moore six years ago). Did Cormier show any remorse? Nope. He nonchalantly skated off the ice like he just got a two minute penalty for interference.
This isn’t even the first time Cormier has used an errant elbow as a battering ram. In the World Juniors, he broke the nose of a Swedish player while skating off the ice for a line change. In that case, the puck was nowhere near the incident. Evidently, Cormier is just an inconsiderate asshole who needs to taste the heavy fists of justice.
I sincerely hope the QMJHL sticks to its guns and keeps Cormier banned for the rest of the season. Playing junior hockey is a privilege and Cormier has shown that he doesn’t deserve such a privilege.
I love how the New Jersey Devils have decided to honour the suspension and won’t send Cormier to their farm team to circumvent the CHL ban.
Truthfully, Cormier shouldn’t even be given a chance to come back until Mikael Lam has fully recovered from his injuries and is back on the ice himself. Then the punishment would truly fit the crime.
As promised, here is a two hour live recap of last night’s episode of The Bachelor:
8:00 – I sit here in my living room with Mama and Sisters Tewks. We’re having a girl’s night. Papa Tewks is nowhere to be found. I suspect he is out looking for a straight son.
8:01 – Watching the episode preview, Mama Tewks just remarked that Jake “is thinking too much with his penis.” This should be an interesting evening.
8:02 – A 2 on 1 date? Now we’re talking. Sounds like a regular Saturday night in my bedroom.
8:03 – Have these girls never seen a bus before? Why do they squeal every time something happens?
8:06 – How many times do we need to see Jake on his motorcycle? Yeah, we get it; he’s like Tom Cruise in Top Gun.
8:07 – “If I have to take one for the team and do the 2 on 1, I’ll do it.” Atta girl, Ali. I love her now more than ever.
8:09 – These women are in their twenties, correct? It feels like I’m in the cafeteria in junior high school.
8:14 – Why do they run everywhere? They’re playing hide and seek? Jesus Christ, this is pathetic. Gia's laugh is excruciating. I want to kill myself.
8:15 – Ten bucks Jake has a boner with Gia wrapped around his waist.
8:16 – I’m pretty sure everyone stills call you Mr. Dateless, Jake.
8:17 – Spin the bottle: first time is cheek, second time is lips, third time is . . . penis?
8:18 – Why does Jake always bury his face into these broads’ shoulders? Methinks Jake has some unresolved mommy issues.
8:23 – Ok, let’s be honest. He’s only cooking hot dogs because he wants to see phallic shaped foods enter her mouth.
8:28 – When Gia talks it sounds like she has peanut butter on the roof of her mouth.
8:28 – What do the girls mean when they say “give it all away?” I think their definition and my definition is a little different considering none of them have been naked yet. They must mean emotions and junk.
8:34 – Jake is like that loser in Grease 2 who tries to use a bike to look cool.
8:35 – Ok, we’re at the beach. I better see some fake boobs in a bikini or I’m going to lose my mind.
8:38 – If these girls did Crossfit, they’d be able to get the dune buggy unstuck.
8:39 – “It’s all over my face!” That’s what she said.
8:40 – “I invited everyone to roll down the hill.” Why? These dates seem like the opposite of fun. I would refuse to do any of this bullshit.
8:46 – “I have sand in every crevice in my body”. Oddly, that comment aroused me.
8:47 – Thanks for dressing up for the group dinner, Jake. It looks like he’s going to buy lumber at Home Depot.
8:48 – Do we have confirmation that Jake has ever been with a woman before? He is the epitome of awkward.
8:52 – Why is he laying on top of her like that? What happened to the testicles Jake seemingly developed last week? I am embarrassed as a member of the male gender right now.
8:55 – Vienna is pretty wide. She’s got a linebacker’s frame. She looks like one of the rock formations at Stonehenge.
9:03 – I think Ella gets hotter every episode. She’s starting to grow on me. Kathryn looks like Jay Leno’s daughter.
9:05 – “I look for faith and family values.” Me too, Jake.
9:06 – I would get absolutely hammered drunk on this 2 on 1 date.
9:09 – Oh, Kathryn, nagging and being a bitch is not the way to get a husband. You’re gone, sweetheart.
9:16 – That was a shocker. Ella is a babe. I bet it’s because she has a kid. Too much baggage.
9:18 – WOW!!!! Double elimination. Now that’s a twist. Nice move, Jake. He always seems to redeem himself in the second hour of the episode.
9:20 – Why are they crying that both chicks are gone? Shouldn’t they be happy? I don’t understand this show.
9:28 – Corrie’s gone too. “Do I make you nervous? Why not?” Shut up. No, Corrie, you’re not good looking enough to make me nervous, you arrogant skank.
9:30 – Ali is amazing. I might have to creep her on Facebook after this episode. Maybe give her a little poke. Or is that too soon?
9:34 – How much does Chris Harrison make for hosting this show? He does absolutely nothing. What a sweet gig. Excuse me ladies, I have to make a quick toast and get a production assistant to forge my signature on a date card. Now, where’s my cheque?
9:42 – Stop crying. Christ, this guy is such a pussy.
9:43 – He wants to get rid of two more? Jake is running through these broads like nobody’s business. For a complete wuss, he’s a cold-hearted player.
9:49 – I don’t know how Jake can get rid of Ashleigh in that dress. Wow. Let’s just say my computer just flipped involuntarily off my lap.
9:54 – “It’s not about sex appeal, it’s about heart appeal.” It is? I did not get that memo.
Well, this was fun. My revamped top 3:
1. Ali
2. Tenley
3. I don’t like the rest of them.
I knew it couldn’t last the entire season. I knew Brett Favre’s conservative passing attack and smart decision-making would eventually be thrown out the window and he’d return to his gunslinging ways.
However, I didn’t expect that we’d have to wait until the NFC Championship game for Favre’s typical, ill-advised, go-for-broke style of play. Despite everything I’ve written about him ), I must concede that I’ve been very impressed with Favre’s play all year long.
He played great during the regular season. Why? Because he stopped trying to be the hero and just conducted himself like another member of the team. There’s a reason why he threw so few interceptions this season: he stuck to making high percentage throws and leaned on his running game more so than in Green Bay.
It’s amazing what can happen when you stop making stupid throws and force balls into triple coverage. Instead, check down your receivers and make the easiest pass. It’s not rocket science. Favre did this beautifully all season and I begrudgingly rated him to be one of the top five quarterbacks in the NFL this year.
Even last night, through fifty-nine minutes of the game, Favre’s stellar performance had the Vikings on the precipice of their fifth Super Bowl appearance. In fact, if it wasn’t for Minnesota’s complete inability to hang onto the football, the Vikings would have blown the Saints out of the water.
Still, Minnesota was poised to kick a field goal with no time remaining on the clock to win the game in regulation. With nineteen seconds left, in Saints territory, Favre rolled out to his right, looking to pick up another ten yards to give Ryan Longwell a chance to boot the pigskin through the uprights.
Favre looked upfield and saw no defenders in his vicinity. He could have easily ran the ball himself, slid for a first down and given Longwell a very makeable field goal attempt. That was the safe play. That was the smart play. That was the play we’d come to expect from the 2009 version of Brett Favre.
Unfortunately, the lure of his old swashbuckling ways was too much to pass up. Favre stupidly forced a throw across his body in a blanket of coverage. Sure enough, he was picked off, the Saints won the toss and New Orleans was off celebrating their first Super Bowl berth in team history.
What a bonehead decision by Favre; although, it was probably a good outcome for my sanity. With Favre limping around on his gimpy ankle and still making completions, I could have not have tolerated the fawning appreciation by the media over Brett if the Vikings had, in fact, won. Honestly, if Favre led the game-winning drive last night, I’m pretty sure he would have been elected President of the United States.
How about Peyton Manning? He adjusted beautifully to the Jets suffocating defensive coverage and brought the Colts back from an early 11 point deficit to earn his second Super Bowl trip. Manning is the most prepared quarterback to ever play the game. He literally imposes his will on teams. I don’t see how the Colts can be stopped.
Kudos to Dirty Sanchez and the J-E-T-S. They gave a valiant effort and look to be a force in the AFC for the foreseeable future. They are only going to get better.
A 2-0 Conference Championship weekend puts my playoff record at 6-4 with one game remaining. I challenge any paid football prognosticator to put their abilities (and paycheque) up against Tewks in a football knowledge battle royale.
I cannot be stopped.
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