Cszem's Corner: NFL Picks

(BOD - Anna Nicole Miller)

CSzem is going to step up to the plate and provide us with a weekly NFL picks column to be posted on Fridays. He's a real mensch. Also, the other website I have been working on will be unleashed on Wednesday morning with two articles. I will post the site adress in Tuesday's podcast column.

As this is my initial foray into the realm of a public picks column, I feel the need to start with the mother of all caveats. So here it is: I am TERRIBLE at picking NFL games. Absolutely awful. I am so bad that in my "Pick'Em" pool, I buried myself so badly and so far down in the standings, that three weeks ago I handed the picking duties off to Mrs. CSzem (a move which has dramatically improved my performance in the pool) - and that pool is simply trying to pick winners, without even taking the spread into account. So....yeah....this might not go all that well.

But as has been evident through multiple podcast ambushes, and a Guest Column written from the hospital a day after OSzem was born, Tewks cares far more about the entertainment of you the reader than he does about potentially embarrassing me in a public forum (the fact that I keep coming back for more is a whole other discussion).

So here goes, these picks come with the official warning that if you follow them too closely, you are likely jeopardizing your ability to:

A) Feed your family
B) Pay your rent or mortgage
C) Avoid having your thumbs broken

Buffalo (+2.5) v. Chicago

After that build up, might as well start these picks with the lunacy of picking the worst team in the league - a team that hasn't won a game yet this year, no less. The Bills have been knocking on the door, and this has great potential to be a really weird game (being played at Rogers Centre). Plus, I'll be in attendance and want to bet on the "home" team.

San Diego (-3) @ Houston

Feels like the Chargers have started their annual late season surge. They cost me money last week by covering when I thought they wouldn't, so it stands to reason that this week they'll cost me money by NOT covering when I think they will.....

Carolina (+6.5) v. New Orleans

This weekend has a bunch of "home dogs" (that means the road team is favoured, Tewks), and I think it's going to turn out to be one of those days where people can’t figure out what’s going on when a bunch of bad teams beat good teams (or at least keep games close).

Arizona (+8) @ Minnesota

Can someone please explain to me how the Vikings are laying 8 points to ANYONE? I know the Cardinals are bad on the road, but the Vikings are an absolute mess.

Tampa Bay (+9) @ Atlanta

Line should be 6.5 or 7. Tampa’s a good team, and I am 100% buying on Josh Freeman. The oddsmakers are giving Atlanta lots of love here, and while they absolutely should win this game, I think it stays in single digits.

NY Jets (-4) @ Detroit

The Lions are coming off a breakthrough win against the Redskins. The Jets are coming off seemingly a mental breakdown against the Packers. If you don’t think that’s going to completely reverse course, you haven’t been paying attention. LOVE the Jets here.

Baltimore (-5) v. Miami

Miami has let to lose a road game (and yet to win a home game), which is ridiculous, and won’t continue in the NFL. “Football Outsiders” (which is a football statistics website that geeks and gambling addicts flock to) says that they won’t win more than one more game on the road. This won’t be that one.

New England (-4.5) @ Cleveland

This is the best team in the league (fact, not my opinion) against the Cleveland F’ing Browns. And they’re only laying 4.5?? I feel like I’m taking crazy pills.

Seattle (OFF) v. NY Giants

This line is OFF, presumably because Charlie “J.C.” Whitehurst is likely to be starting for the Seahawks. Whatever the line comes in at, I like Seattle (I realize how ridiculous that is). The Giants are due for a letdown and traveling all the way across the country to play in one of the NFL’s toughest stadiums is as good a spot as any.

Oakland (-2.5) v. Kansas City

If you had told me before the season that this would be a huge matchup with significant playoff implications, I would have assumed you spent a little too much time hanging out with Ron Washington. But here we are. I actually think both of these teams are good, as ridiculous as that sounds.

Indy (+3) @ Philadelphia

I just don’t see Peyton Manning losing this game by more than a FG. I actually think they should win this game. The NFC is a disaster, so I’m taking the AFC in pretty much any matchups possible. (Actually, looking back, I’ve done that in every inter-conference game….so at least I’m consistent)

Green Bay (-7.5) v. Dallas

They could probably put a “1” at the start of this line and I’d still take the Packers. In all honesty, it’s ridiculous the respect that the Cowboys keep getting. Last week, they were laying 6.5 points, and this week, if they were any other awful 1-6 team coming into Lambeau, they’d be getting 13.5.

Pittsburgh (-5) @ Cincinnati

In a perfect world, I’d finish this column with something exceptionally witty or clever. But in a perfect world, I wouldn’t have to sit through Steelers/Bengals in Prime Time on MNF.

Tune in next week to see how I did, and for more surefire winners (aka the opposite of what I pick).

Talkin' with Tewks Live: World Series Recap

(BOD - January Jones)

I had hoped that today's podcast would have included a discussion of Game 5 and a look forward to Game 6, but Edgar and Renteria, and by extension Cliff Lee, made sure that hope was crushed like a grape.

Instead, CSzem and I touched on the following:

- Some pretty harsh Cliff Lee backlash
- The drug habits and managerial decisions of Ron Washington
- Where will Lee pitch next year?
- The amazing story of the Giants
- Playing for the Yankees
- Women and their pursuit of the Almighty Dollar
- Ryan Smyth leaving Edmonton
- Chris Pronger cheating on his wife
- John Farrell and Manny Ramirez
- MLB Awards
- The Jays chances in 2011

Talkin' with Tewks Live: World Series Recap

Enjoy.

Bonkers for Bumgarner

(BOD - Angelina Jolie)

In the interest of full disclosure, I must admit that, as of ten days ago, my knowledge of Madison Bumgarner began and ended at the juvenile joy I obtained every time I said his name out loud.

After last night’s performance, the childish snickers I enjoyed from his surname will be the last thing I focus on when I hear about the 21 year old, left-handed flamethrower. Bumgarner gave the Giants a stranglehold on the World Series with eight fantastic innings of three hit, shutout ball. The best word to describe the Rangers hitters as they flailed away at Bumgarner’s offerings would be flummoxed.

He was so calm and cool on the mound that Bumgarner looked like he was pitching in a meaningless spring training game and not on the biggest stage in the game. And, might I remind you, this is at the age of 21.

What was I doing on Halloween night when I was 21? Dressed as David Hasselhoff from Baywatch sloppily trying to offer women free mouth to mouth resuscitations while I covered my body in coconut-scented massage oil (to each his own).

Bumgarner was able to throw strikes to both sides of the plate and had tremendous control of his fastball. His odd delivery was giving Texas fits all night long. The Giants lefty almost slingshots the ball across his body and seems to generate the majority of his velocity with his lightning-fast arm action. Bumgarner’s pitches get on hitters quick, making his stuff appear harder than it actually is (which must be nice when you can throw 93 miles an hour in the first place).

Allow me to be a party pooper for one second and express concerns about the durability of Bumgarner’s arm to handle the strain of his violent, upper body-dominant delivery. There is a litany of pitchers who throw with mechanics similar to Bumgarner and a lot of them are forced to undergo shoulder or elbow reconstruction because of it. Every time I watched him release the ball, I cringed.

Basically, his arm is a ticking time bomb. He may not have a problem for 10 years or it may fall apart next April, I have no idea, but he can’t continue to throw like that or he’s at a serious risk for an arm injury.

While Bumgarner was the story of the game, I want to make a point to congratulate Bruce Bochy on not falling pray to egregious over-managing that seems afflict every manager once October rolls around. As early as the sixth inning yesterday, both Joe Buck and Tim McCarver were wondering aloud when Bochy was going to make a move to his bullpen and get Bumgarner out of there.

Why? He had only thrown 76 pitches through six innings and was having no trouble setting down the top offence in Major League Baseball. Just because the game is in the later innings, it doesn’t mean that you have to go to the bullpen automatically.

Guys are in the bullpen because they aren’t good enough to be starters. You leave your starting pitcher out there as long as possible because he is your best chance to win. I love how Bochy let Bumgarner go out for the eighth and throw over 100 pitches. He is definitely winning the managerial battle over Ron “8 Ball” Washington.

Cliff Lee versus Timmy Lincecum tonight in a rematch of Game 1.

I can’t wait.