Today’s column fits in nicely with the themes of the previous two days. Some might say that’s due to my high-level thinking and supreme ability to craft relevant, knowledgeable posts each and every week in an overarching goal of journalistic greatness. Or it’s akin to pulling a rabbit out a hat (or a gerbil out of Richard Gere’s ass).
The NFL season kicked off last night in a rematch of last year’s NFC Championship game, pitting the New Orleans Saints against the Minnesota Vikings and their peerless quarterback, Brett Favre, Brett Favre, Brett Favre. This is real football, ladies and gentleman; not CIS, my quarterback can only throw the ball 25 yards with a spiral and my running back runs the 40 yard dash in 6 flat, crap.
Speaking of Favre, Papa Tewks nearly sprained an ankle jumping on number four’s bandwagon. Papa Tewks was so happy that his boyfriend was back in his life, he looked like a five year old kid on Christmas morning. At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if he slept with a Favre jersey underneath his pillow.
Begrudgingly, I decided to tune in. The first thing I noticed is that the game was being shown on the NFL Network. Much like Sportsnet One, the NFL Network is only available in a small percentage of homes in the United States, which means millions of fans were unable to watch the kickoff to the 2010 NFL season.
Second, I went channel surfing for the game around 8:30pm, figuring I would join the game in progress about halfway through the first quarter.
Nope.
Instead, I was forced to watch Bob Costas throw to a Matthew Good concert (are they still relevant?). Then, I watched Harry Connick Jr. lead some type of parade float up and down the field while a marching band played. It was all very surreal, but, unfortunately, THERE WAS NO FOOTBALL TO WATCH!!
Why do all sports leagues insist on starting games after 9pm on weekday nights on the East Coast? Yes, I know it’s all about the pursuit of the All Mighty Dollar and a bunch of other greedy bullshit. And I know that the head honchos at the league offices that think a 9pm start will ensure both East and West Coast audiences will be at their most robust.
But I guarantee that the East Coast numbers drop off precipitously after halftime. Why not start the game at the 8, which means that if you want to watch the entire game, you can still be asleep by 11:30 and not be a zombie at work the next morning.
I didn’t even make it to the end of the first quarter as my beauty rest beckoned. Yes, I sound like an angry, old curmudgeon. And this is at the age of 25. I can’t wait to see what happens when I’m actually old. I’m going to make Andy Rooney look like Mr. Rogers.
What happened in the game? Brett Favre threw an interception and the Vikings lost. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad game after all.
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1 comment:
“work the next morning” – Good one! With your busy work schedule I’m sure this is a real problem for you.
Just hang in there because when you finally hit the big time and are rich & famous living in your Hollywood Hills mansion it will be a 6pm start so it shouldn’t interfere with your beauty sleep.
AG
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