Ozzie Guillen Has a Point

(BOD - Candice Crawford)

I was fully prepared to spend the Friday columns discussing the trashy greatness that is Jersey Shore Season 2. But after a lacklustre premiere episode, I wasn’t convinced the show had enough substance to recapture the lightning in a bottle magic of last season.

However, I did learn something very important from one of the greatest seers of our time, The Situation. Last night he taught me about the ‘shirt before a shirt.’ Apparently, before going to the club to hit on ugly girls all night, one must wear a wifebeater tank top as the shirt before the shirt. Then, approximately ten minutes before going to the bar, you put on your club-worthy shirt. The shirt before the shirt ensures that your ‘good’ shirt stays ‘fresh’ as long as possible.

And now you know.

Ozzie Guillen is at it again. A few times a season, you can count on the mercurial Chicago White Sox manager to fly off the handle about some issue, while giving his very specific and very controversial opinions on how to ‘fix’ it.

Normally, people don’t take too much heed in what Ozzie says and it’s dismissed pretty much as soon as he opens his mouth. I think he’s not taken seriously because of his charming mix of English and Spanish when speaking (he usually gets so fired up that Spanish starts leaking in to his sentences), his reputation as a ‘speak first, think later’ type person, and his accent. Guillen’s heavy accent makes him sound like the multicultural sidekick in a bad buddy cop movie (cough, The Other Guys, cough).

Interestingly, no one has ignored Ozzie’s latest comments or dismissed them as ludicrous. To paraphrase, Guillen said that it’s unfair that Latin American players are forced to get by without interpreters while Japanese imports receive such help all the time.

His point is salient, but the fix isn’t to provide Latin American players with interpreters as well. The focus should be on teaching players English with regular language classes. To provide these players with interpreters would allow them to just continue speaking Spanish and not learning the language of majority of MLB.

More often that not, Latin players are left to fend for themselves in the minor leagues, far away from home, with no grasp of the language of most of their teammates. They should be given the opportunity to learn the language of their teammates, to socialize with them, and become a part of the family.

However, I do think Asian players should be given interpreters. Why? Because when an Asian import comes to North America, there is a 99% chance he will be the only person on the roster who can speak his language. There are a few Spanish speakers on every major and minor league club, so new Latin imports will still have someone to talk to.

To sum up: Latin interpreters, no, Asian interpreters, yes, English classes for all, a resounding yes.