It was remarked last Friday that my columns lacked a certain reality TV flavour and the writer of the comment expressed dismay at the absence of reality TV coverage. Or maybe he was happy that I just focused on sports. I don’t know; I wasn’t really paying attention. Nevertheless, back by popular demand here is a recap of last night’s Jersey Shore.
10:01 – The Situation is right. Angelina is a ho. I don’t understand what the problem is.
10:02 – This Mike dude is in a weird situation. Why is he still standing there like a mute? What a chump.
10:03 – Pauly D has an amazing tan. He looks like a young Hulk Hogan. And I say that with a staunch record of heterosexuality (ok maybe a questionable record of heterosexuality).
10:04 – “She’s a girl and she’s bringing guys home. Girl don’t do that. Guys do.” My sentiments exactly. Pauly D for President of the world.
10:06 – Jwoww is like Two Face. Or the ugly/hot chick from that episode of Seinfeld. Some scenes she looks amazing and in other scenes she looks like a meth addict. Whoa, bad lighting on the porch.
10:11 – I LOVE T-SHIRT TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
10:13 – “Less clothes the better.” I really like Samantha from Canada. Here’s a question: why is The Situation taking the girl to the club with the rest of the group after prepping the smush room? Dude, you have an empty house! Smash that girl for the entire night. Don’t take her to the club; it’s just a needless diversion.
10:17 – I love the addition of ‘O Canada’ during The Situation’s smush session. Great touch by the producers.
10:30 – Pauly D is the MVP of this season. Just consistently brings the funny each and every episode.
10:37 – Wow, Jwoww actually has some real human emotion. What a sweet moment . . . God, her boobs are huge.
10:52 – Alex is Angelina’s guy? Since when? I hate this girl with every fibre of my being.
10:55 – Snooki taking off her earrings was like watching an NHL enforcer take off his gloves and elbow pads being throwing down.
10:56 – I sincerely think Angelina is a pathological liar. Good riddance.
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2 comments:
When I wrote that comment last Friday I figured this would be your response. You’re so predictable. No matter what I say I know you will always say or do the opposite just to be a dink.
So given that fact here is a list of things for you:
• don’t give me a $10K,
• don’t give me your new car,
• don’t finally stumble out of the closet and admit your undying love for Greztpo,
• don’t come to the gym wearing your underwear on the outside of your shorts,
• don’t shovel my driveway after every snowfall this winter,
• don’t paint my house,
• do talk endless about how great looking and smart you think you are,
• do make me run the fitness loop twice,
• do continue to live with your parents and sponge off them (remember mama & poppa Tewks he always does the opposite of what I say so you are welcome),
• and of course do write about reality TV every single day in this blog
AG
long time no read Tewks...too much sports crap for me.
my vote is Survivor or America's Next Top model recaps (to give you a new supergay show to watch)
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