Hope Springs Eternal and Survivor Thoughts

Even though I’m ecstatic that spring training has started in earnest, which means that warm weather is right around the corner, I am somewhat melancholic at the news of Roy Halladay’s first Grapefruit League start.

He was typical Doc yesterday afternoon. In his two innings of work, only one batter reached base (on an error) and Halladay threw an incredible 21 strikes in 23 pitches. That type of perfection is unheard of, even from the best pitchers in the game.

Now, I have to listen to Phillies fans and the American media wax poetic on how great Roy is; something that we Toronto fans have known for years. It’s tough to listen to these guys fawn all over Roy, knowing that I will never see him pitch in a Blue Jays uniform again. He’s going to win thirty games this year and hopefully get the World Series ring he so richly deserves.

Truthfully, it’s going to be hard to be a Jays fan this year. I honestly don’t know if I can do it. Sure, I’ll watch the games and follow the team, but it’s going to take a little while for the team to gain back my fandom.

I’m kind of like a scorned politician’s wife whose husband cheated on her. Yes, I’m going to stay with him, but it’s going to take some time for me to forgive his infidelities.

What an excellent Survivor episode last night. After a lacklustre episode last week, Probst and company really brought the goods this time.

I feel remiss that I stopped watching Survivor before Coach’s inaugural season. I mean the guy is an absolutely tremendous reality show character.

For all of his egomaniacal blustering, he’s surprisingly deep and multi-layered. I had no idea that his macho act was such a façade and masked with such rampant insecurity. He’s also surprisingly feminine, evidenced by his teary, emotional blubbering when Sandra had the audacity to call him lazy.

The scene after Tribal Council when Coach was talking to Tyson just killed me. I was transfixed by what lay before my eyes on the screen. Tyson talking Coach off the ledge felt like a scene ripped from the script of Good Will Hunting.

“Coach, it’s not your fault.”
"I know.”
“It’s not your fault.”
“Yeah, I know, Tyson.”
“No, no. It’s not your fault.”
"Don’t do this to me man. Not you.”

Boston Rob managed to smack some sense into the Dragon Slayer by basically telling him to man up and to find his nuts. Coach did an immediate 180 and compared himself to the Last of the Mohicans and King Arthur. Then, he quoted Confucius. I am in awe of the man.

The reward challenge felt like an episode of the Price is Right with all of the Sears products presented exactly like one of the Showcase Showdown prizes. Speaking of the reward challenge, how hot did the women look all greased up from that sliding track? That was as close to porn as you can get at 8pm on network television.

Danielle’s breasts looked AMAZING! They should really have their own tribe. They’re also the most interesting thing about Danielle.

James seemed somewhat subdued throughout this episode. Maybe Probst got him an extra HGH cycle or something. I was quite impressed that he didn’t punch Sandra in the face during the reward challenge.

Seeing Boston Rob and Russell square off against each other in a battle of wits is like watching two Bond super villains go head to head. I think Russell is, and should be, worried. He’s never faced an adversary quite like Boston Rob, which was evident when Rob once again dominated the immunity challenge with his smarts and puzzle prowess.

What a great move by Tom to get the immunity idol and coerce JT to switch alliances in a complete blindside of Cirie. She deserved to go, for the sake of North America to bear witness to more Tom and Colby interaction. They’re great, like father and son.

This is shaping up to be one of the best seasons of Survivor ever.