Cooperstown Doesn't Have a Cover Charge

I don’t usually like to talk baseball during the winter months, as it makes me pine for spring during these cold, winter nights, but the results of yesterday’s Baseball Hall of Fame vote has forced me to weigh in.

First, I’m not going to denigrate the induction of Andre Dawson, in his ninth year of eligibility, into the Hall of Fame. I never saw the man play and have never really heard much about him except that he has a badass nickname: The Hawk.

Also, Dawson is the only man to win a Most Valuable Player award while languishing on a last place team (the Chicago Cubs in 1987).

From everything I’ve read, written by people much smarter than me, Andre Dawson deserves to be in the Hall of Fame.

I’d much rather discuss the players who fell short of the very strict standards imposed by the Members of the Baseball Writers’ Association of America (with 10 or more years of consecutive service).

How Robbie Alomar was not the first player to be enshrined in Cooperstown wearing a Blue Jays uniform is an absolute travesty. There is no sane explanation why Alomar did not achieve 75% of the vote.

He was the best player in the game at his position for over a decade. He was the best position player on two World Series winning teams. People bought tickets solely to watch Alomar’s offensive prowess and defensive wizardry.

That is the definition of a Hall of Famer.

Yes, he spit on an umpire. It was a reprehensible act, but one for which Alomar has expressed extreme remorse. The umpire in question, John Hirshbeck, has forgiven Alomar and they are now good friends. Hirshbeck and Alomar even raise money for charity together.

I guarantee the writers who didn’t vote for Alomar will get up on their moral high horse and point to the spitting incident for the reason for Alomar’s exclusion.

That is complete bullshit.

Ty Cobb is in the Hall of Fame and he was, by all accounts, a horrible human being. Ray Liotta, in Field of Dream, said it best: “Ty Cobb wanted to play. But none of us could stand the son of a bitch when he was alive, so we told him to stick it.”

And what about all the owners from before 1950 who made a concerted effort to bar black players from playing in the MLB? And who cheated legions of players out of respectable wages? All those assholes are in the Hall of Fame.

The Hall of Fame isn’t Heaven. Its purpose is to celebrate baseball greatness. Robbie Alomar fits that bill.

Bert Blyleven should be in Cooperstown. He has more wins and more strikeouts than any other pitcher currently not in the Hall of Fame. Although, I don’t really understand how he can garner more votes over the years, when he’s stopped playing. Either he’s a Hall of Famer or he’s not. Bert’s case shouldn’t become more favourable as time passes (which just proves the idiocy of the voters).

Truthfully, he should be inducted solely for having the greatest nickname ever bestowed by Chris Berman. Bert “Be Home” Blyleven.

Jack Morris should also be in the Hall of Fame as one the greatest big game pitchers in baseball history. He thrived in pressure-packed situations as the top dog of two World Series winning rotations (Twins and Blue Jays).

He had one of the best pitching performances in postseason history in Game 7 of the 1991 World Series. Morris threw 10 shutout innings to defeat the Atlanta Braves. He was the epitome of a workhorse.

Plus, Jack Morris gave the baseball world the greatest quote in the history of the game. When asked what he thought of female reporters being allowed in the clubhouse, Morris quipped, “The only time I want to talk to a woman when I’m naked is if I’m on top of her or she’s on top of me.”

Sheer brilliance.