Just Two Guys Gettin' Their Cuba On (Rocky IV Edition)

Tewks and I embark for Cuba early Tuesday morning: meaning that the numbers of spiked beach volleyballs, sexually satisfied ladies and fruity alcohol drinks will number in the dozens by Wednesday afternoon.

Seriously though: we plan on playing a lot of beach volleyball.

In honour of travelling to a Communist country, this column is devoted to the most famous Communist traveller: Rocky Balboa. Who went behind the Iron Curtain in Rocky IV, defeated Ivan Drago and ended Communism in Soviet Russia.

R4: "Some weather we've been having huh? ... Good for ya. Toughin' ya up."
Cuba: "Some broken bone in your foot huh? ... Good for ya. Toughin' ya up."

I've got a confession to make: I broke Tewks' foot last year in the Dominican. I saw him come down for that spike and I tripped him. I only did it to see how tough he was ... and he passed. He should've been drinking more milk though.

R4: "I can't get over the SIZE of this Russian."

Cuba: "I can't get over the SIZE of these Canadians."

One thing's for sure: we're showing up for this vacation in shape.

R4: "I don't want to change: I like who I am!"

Here's the problem: I'm getting older. I am going to do things to my body this week that I'm probably not fit to do anymore ... mainly the alcohol consumption and the potential of lying next to a woman - the physical stuff I can handle, you know, because of the Crossfit. Nevertheless, this vacation will be a serious test to my body and my youth.

R4: "Are you planning to grow reindeer or something? How the heck are you supposed to train here?"

I don't want to know what the exercise facilities are going to be like in our resort, but I have a feeling I'll be using the same equipment used to whip Cuban Revolutionaries into shape in the 1950s.

So we'll workout, play some volleyball, and maybe even get a Rocky III beach run on - the hardest part will be convincing the person taking the pictures that we're not gay.

Recap to follow.